Here is what we’re looking at:
- In order to write a coherent letter to my local member of the Pennsylvania House of Representatives, I need my lawyer to review my divorce to identify the loopholes that should be closed;
- Once I write this letter, I have to wait for a response that may or may not come;
- Regardless of any response — or lack thereof — I will need to follow up on my overture;
- I need to connect with as many fathers as possible who have gone through experiences similar to mine;
- These fathers will need to sign a petition — maybe I’ll go to change.org;
- The petition will need to be forwarded to the Pennsylvania House of Representatives;
- There will be more follow up;
- I’ll need to learn grant writing to appropriate funds to research how, nationally, the family court system is flawed and diminishes the quality of life for fathers and the children of separated parents;
- I must network with as many father’s rights groups across the country as possible;
- We will need to gather as much information about family law as possible and make it transparent for fathers in crisis; and
- I’ll have to eat, drink and sleep this cause to the bitter end.
None of these steps will be accomplished without complications, but I’m past the point of caring. The changes needed in the system are not just about my kids, but future generations of children who, if things go on as they are, will have diminished senses of family, self-worth, decency, integrity and all things that constitute quality human beings.
Nobody is perfect, but when you look around at how people carry themselves, it ain’t a pretty picture. This all stems from declining standards of conduct in the home.
One of Michael Jackson’s many classics was Man in The Mirror. I had been cynical about the lyrics when the song was released. Now that I have kids, the song makes perfect sense.
If I can get through these next 6 months or so standing tall, I’ll know there’s nothing I can’t do. But it hasn’t been about me for the last 10 years; not since I heard the first of two tiny hearts beating through ultrasound machines. Now, it’s all about the legacy, the gifts of decent lives, genuine family and the understanding of how to appreciate it all.